Dating and oral sex
When another person enters the picture, the spouse who was inattentive can suddenly realize they have been part of the problem.
So if both partners really want the relationship to last, they work harder at everything-including sex." As you can imagine, who did the cheating matters.
They get functional about sex instead of seductive." Dating couples have a much different mindset, she says, "and it shows in their sexual satisfaction and happiness with one another." For some, dating just one partner may be too limiting.
"My sex life is even better than [it was] in my teens and 20s," says Carrie F., 50, who keeps a full dance card in Van Nuys, Calif., and isn't planning on settling for one beau any time soon.
Women were almost three times as likely as men to say that their partner's cheating caused a lasting tension and lack of trust.
Men are either more forgiving or just harder up: Only 6 percent of male cheatees say their sex lives were worse after their partner's infidelity. Ironically, a wandering partner may be doing you a big favor.
The percentage of people who say they engage in affectionate acts like hugging, kissing, and caressing at least once a week also fell between 20. What's more, fewer survey respondents agree that "there's too much emphasis on sex today" than they did in 2004 (though maybe Janet Jackson's wardrobe malfunction at the 2004 Super Bowl had us fed up back then). Research has long shown that money worries sap sex, and with the recent unemployment scourge, yo-yoing 401(k)s and rampaging foreclosures, there's been no shortage in worries.
Pepper Schwartz, a sexologist at the University of Washington in Seattle and AARP's love and relationships ambassador.
"It's hard for some people to feel warm and sexy when they are afraid of losing their home-or they have already lost their job!
These probably aren't questions you'd relish answering, at least not in front of the kids.
Between 20, the percentage of people in their 50s who say they have sex at least once a week took about a 10-point plunge for both sexes (women dropped from 43 to 32 percent, and men from 49 to 41 percent). The survey found that only 43 percent of older Americans say they're satisfied with their sex lives (down from 51 percent in 2004), while the percentage who are dissatisfied with their sex lives increased.
About half enjoy such simple nurturing activities at least weekly, although those with a regular partner are much more likely to report such frequency. To put it mildly, financial stress is probably hitting midlifers below the belt.