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Fish pictures can be subtle warnings to potential mates that they’re immersed in a time-intensive and sometimes expensive pastime.AJ Scheff, a 35-year-old environmental scientist who belongs to the online fishing community, told me his first marriage ended partially because “I was spending too much on boating and fishing.” So when he got back into dating again, he decided to make it clear to women he matched with exactly what they were getting into — for three years after his divorce, every photo he posted on Bumble was either on a boat or at the dock.“I wanted to make my hobby known in hopes to find someone who also enjoys it as much as me,” he says.Eventually, Scheff matched with a woman who had fishing photos of her own.
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In a photo on his Tinder profile, John Prioli is standing on a pier in Greenpoint, the Manhattan skyline in the distance, holding a live striped bass slightly larger than the size of a standard pillow.
He’s wearing a beanie and a leather jacket over a Ghost concert T-shirt. Chatting online with matches, it seemed, wasn’t going to get me any answers.
For the past five years, Prioli, a 32-year-old North Carolina native who lives in Brooklyn, has used a handful of dating apps off and on — Tinder, Bumble and Hinge — and built profiles featuring similar photos. I get the men who put a dog or cat selfie in their profile — it’s an easy conversation starter, and gives guys a chance to show their tender, pet-dad side. Then I started a conversation with someone more geographically acceptable. (He gave her his number after she admired several 30-pound fish he brought into a sushi restaurant where she was eating.) But he — and plenty of my new fishermen friends — warned me that fish love stories aren’t always sweet.
We’d already chatted about weekend plans, so I followed up with another inquiry: “Looks like you’re a fisherman. The desire to show off your fishing skills online, they told me, isn’t just boasting; it’s also a weed-out mechanism.
It should make her wonder what it is, why it is, or how you’re doing it.